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The Gottman Institutes Editorial Team is composed of staff members who contribute to the Institutes overall message. 255 Defensiveness is defined as self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victimhood in attempt to ward off a perceived attack. oN/A0xVZqgjuNK1F7e4+sCWCWKOFWRk9R0oFFBXkxIoCe+RmLBATE0WP+W/LkEqQ3zwx3drfBxP6 0XMMnmSwstLSa5ezuDdOWe3uNUW7meSNhwU21RCF5MG6Er0xW0R+Xeh3nlbzJPr2t67pj6LJZ29k DBAMDAwMDAwQDA4PEA8ODBMTFBQTExwbGxscHx8fHx8fHx8fHwEHBwcNDA0YEBAYGhURFRofHx8f PROCESS 5ljX9PeUpafGupzID/ktpl4T+KDFISXz7q/nbSdcsbrRvXu9K+p3U1zp0FmJy9xb8PRiMw3T6wZe 0 <>>> RGB Measure your relationship health with a research-based self-assessment, then receive a tailored digital relationship plan proven to heal and strengthen your connection. mYcKEjsT0xSpTQ6fIFI+uB0PJGK3TgHoaq4ZSCNiKdMVSeO6vawkaNKgUxiK3aEejAwY1kQAvx40 We use this metaphor to describe communication styles that, according to our research, can predict the end of a relationship. 0 JcEx28Mj8v3aFl+KnqHjzjpsDt8AwoZf5b8qXujaheXE2u3+qW1xX6ta3shk9AvK8j0avxbMqLUf R=63 G=169 B=245 83 RGB Avenir %PDF-1.3 Id appreciate it.. RGB 36 Sale! 46 R=96 G=56 B=19 R=251 G=176 B=59 76 PN/yPm/5rxVBt5Y0kyNKDdI7FmYx3l3HUvQsfglXrxGKbXJ5d05C7K90pkPJyLy7qxAC1P73c0UD /j58uNO1K49VHJgvmn/HX6T/ADd/Sn1X/EP6O0v9Jfon1vq/1f8A0f1PT9b95T6t/ecv8rtikdHr 0 /wCPf6f44qo4ql+vwavcaRcQ6PcJa6jIALe4kAZUPIciQyyA/DX9k4pYmvk/8yvWeSTzlA6s7kRj anq0OtHydqkmu69YR6dbRLLArT2F2JlVVVbwQoKWrip4sMVopRpugf8AOP8Ab3UGraT5P1GWLTZo R=0 G=104 B=55 5vSNAj1AaZAt/wAjIYYxKJTycy8aSk1/ZZtwDv8ALoMY1ezmRuhfNE6dvCzJUWztytVPaMqKfIE1 XurWHlHWr3R42l1a2sp5bCJEMrNOkZMYEYB5nkBt3xSHlj+e/wA1E1jRYY7e6uNGuLt45NQfSp4J 0 / R=242 G=242 B=242 Let me call them right now.. AAIRAQMRAf/EAaIAAAAHAQEBAQEAAAAAAAAAAAQFAwIGAQAHCAkKCwEAAgIDAQEBAQEAAAAAAAAA OTHER GOTTMAN RELATIONSHIP GUIDES: Relaxation Small Things Often How to be a Great Listener Aftermath of a Fight Fondness & Admiration Avoid the Four Horsemen 2017 by Dr. John M. Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman. RGB qbnJ2en5KjpKWmp6ipqqusra6voRAAICAQIDBQUEBQYECAMDbQEAAhEDBCESMUEFURNhIgZxgZEy 2s+kIjyPqMU0b2wSKvqMZlYoFTieRrtTfFUFd+e/JFnBbT3nmHTLaC9T1bOWa8t0SaMGnOJmcB1r Another way that we explain this is our discovery of the 5:1 magic ratio of positive to negative interactions that a relationship must have to succeed. $399.00 $199.00 NB5zT+XPMl7DrNgOk+mTSky/Sh39vtfs4p8npv8Azjtq1lrGtfmHq1ixeyv9ZNzbORxJjl9R1qD0 SrZQY35bEks3LcCteg3BxTYQr/l95/8A0pFfDzehWNY2mhjsIIGuZ4yKvM8dUPJFCDlG/EfZ91bT A sign that you may be engaging in this more harmful form of criticism is if you catch yourself using terms like "never" and always"for . When attempts to repair the damage done by these horsemen are met with repeated rejection, Gottman says there is over a 90% chance the relationship 158 0 obj <> endobj yNcXjSxBlDNwfjTj8QBpgSbSvzXP+R13df4q1ryTdM98FurC+Zo7W3v4zNHEZ+IuooQOc6MxnVSw IWUtUgUG9cVpKPLn5u/lx5jhvZ9J12CSHTk9W9knWS1WKMkDmxuUi+GppXpjakFMtP8AP3kXUryK MLBdirsVdiqt/wAe/wBP8cVUcVSnzbDbTeWdTiuUuXhe3cMLIA3INNmhrt6in4lJ2BGKQ8P0m48t VWYOf5UKgh29lqcVXxX9nLJ6SSgTf75b4JB33RqN+GKq+KuxV2KuxV2KuxVJdf8A+Or5b/7aMn/d Avenir.ttc DmT1CtphF5D1+zuIJdXvtF1cWjw89NvLyW3t45VstOtzcrwjNHSWE8EKU4yg1BamK2qJo/nzR7q3 application/pdf RGB 124 255 Iib/AJoxV36Rt/5Jv+RE3/NGKu/SNv8AyTf8iJv+aMVd+kbf+Sb/AJETf80Yqk+vX1t+kvLrFivD RGB 212 For a fun activity focused on relationship growth and exploration, try our interactive Couple's Questions tool: 1. Youre saying that the problem isnt me, its you. RGB If left unchecked, the four horsemen solidify themselves in a relationship as a normal part of communication. Adobe PDF library 15.00 LCn7gdyv34qirC4eaRGilmntnjLl5o/ToSV4cfgirUE164qj8UOxV2KpLr//AB1fLf8A20ZP+6dd endstream endobj 3 0 obj <> endobj 10 0 obj <>/Resources<>/ExtGState<>/Font<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageC/ImageI]/Properties<>/XObject<>>>/Thumb 17 0 R/TrimBox[0.0 0.0 1000.0 1350.0]/Type/Page>> endobj 11 0 obj <>stream R=198 G=156 B=109 RGB NOjafcfpXXI4ZtX9OeONeckhRFnSe5S1jkBBYtt1O9ScFpoohfzQ/K2LzfN5j/Rd4vmdzY6OZ1dJ 3+WnlG5vIL0wXEF1bz3N1HNbXd1A3q3sqzXHIxSJyV5I1PE/Dt0xW0f5e8oaNoFxf3Nj673OpOr3 . PDF "T h e F o u r H o r s e m e n " - B a r r i e r s to C o m m u n i c a 156 ggivrZ5JJHPFURVclmYmgAxWimGn+ZPLupXtzY6dqlne31mSt5a288UssJVuJEiIxZKMKfEOuK0r 22iljsP8O3N1SMWrPLdKrtFM8d5zVeRHD4Bt9liQa4rsyDy2vnD1Lt/Mb2ZqYxZx2IcIAqn1GPqf PROCESS Disclaimer: The resources available on Therapist Aid do not replace therapy, and are intended to be used by qualified professionals. FKrsgSOIlf2GDUrXGl4g7WfyZ843Wua0LC8htNG1AWMVo63Uolhht3svVUR+iWrxtZCP31DXcbk4